We’re Infertile: The Reader’s Digest Version

Since this is a blog about infertility, I guess I should tell my story. Just a warning, there will be TMI in this post. So if you don’t like hearing about lady parts and such, I’d leave now.

I was diagnosed with PCOS when I was about twenty. I had gone in to my doctor because my period was incredibly long and found out I had to have an ovarian cystectomy. They removed a softball sized cyst from my right ovary along with part of my Fallopian tube. I didn’t think much of it because, at such a tender age, I wasn’t sure if I even wanted children.

I was put on birth control to control my cycles. I was fine with this since it meant I had a period every month that lasted two days.

Then, in 2006, I met K and visions of babies and a big happy family started dancing in my head. I went off the pill a few months after we started dating. I was thinking we might have a problem conceiving, so it might take a bit longer. K had no problem with trying early too.

Well, six months passed and I still hadn’t even got my period. So I told K that we should really start trying. His response:

“I thought we were.”

Oh, how naive he was back then.

I explained to him that my body wasn’t working right so I would need a little more help from my doctor. He was okay with it again but I think it threw him a bit. His starter wife and he had no problems having Frick and Frack so he thought if we just had sex a baby would come along.

How innocent.

But then, so was I.

My doctor put me on Clomid. I was so excited. I just knew it was going to work. I didn’t expect the mood swings, crying jags and just general bitchiness that came with it. Poor K, Frick and Frack. They had to endure all this. They really deserve sainthood for what I put them through.

Six cycles of Clomid. Never ovulated. Had to use Provera to start my prior each cycle. Clearly I was with the wrong doctor.

I got engaged and quit my job about eight months before the wedding. So we tried naturally because I no longer had insurance. Of course, no baby.

We took a six month break because Mormon guilt kicked in and I felt I couldn’t get married unless I was living according to gospel standards.

I made my husband wait until our wedding night.

When we returned from our honeymoon, the first thing we did was get me onto K’s insurance. Horrible plan. No infertility coverage at all.

I found Dr. G, a gyno that I absolutely love. He ran some blood work, confirmed that I was a typical PCOS patient and started me on Clomid.

Bitchiness and tears resume.

We did four cycles again. I ovulated on the second cycle, got my positive pregnancy test and lost it three days after finding out. Nothing with the next two cycles.

Dr. G decided it was time for me to go on to a reproductive endocrinologist. We can’t afford that. It was hard enough paying for what little we did with Dr. G. There was no way our budget could handle blood work, ultrasounds and constant monitoring. We also weren’t ready for injectable medications yet.

Another year passes, wonky cycles persist.

In February of this year, I started bleeding heavy everyday for three weeks. I had been doing research on how to regulate my cycles naturally and decided to try the herb vitex.

Two days after I started taking it, my bleeding lightened. A few days after that, it stopped. I ovulated a week later. I was so incredibly surprised that it worked so quickly. My herbalist had said it would most likely take a month or two to regulate my cycle.

A week after ovulating, I started having pregnancy symptoms. Sore boobs, increased sense of smell and tired. I was sure this was finally it. I took a test….negative. A few days later, on March 22nd, I took another test.

Positive!!!

I went to work just glowing. I couldn’t wait for K to get home from work that afternoon so I could share our happy news. Then it happened.

I felt very wet about an hour into work so I went to the bathroom. I started bleeding so heavy there was no way the baby was sticking.

I was devastated. I had to tell K over the phone what was happening. It was a horrible day. I wish I could elaborate but I’m trying to keep this short.

So now we’re on the second round with vitex. Temps look like I might have ovulated again but I was sick a few days so that could have thrown it off. We’re taking a break this month anyway.

Now that you know our history, you can follow what’s happening. Hopefully by fall, there will be a little one on the way. I have a good feeling there will be.

As I was praying last night, I had an image of a little boy building a raft and being unable to get past the breakers. He then went to build a ship. I just knew that it was our baby and he was trying to get to us.

Strange imagery but so comforting.

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